3 Lies Women Often Say To Please Future In Laws

Meeting the parents of a future spouse can be nerve wracking. You want them to like you, you want to like them, You want to put your best foot forward and want to absolutely impress them. And many times in such an excitement, we end up overselling ourselves. We end up saying things about ourselves that are quite false, just in a bid to impress them. Honestly, there are some things that should be clear from the very beginning. And what are they? Read on:

1. Cooking – If you can’t cook. Just tell them. There is nothing wrong in not enjoying cooking. Save yourself from the embarrassment for when they will ask you to cook, and you will have nowhere to run or hide. The whole situation will not be very pleasant because for them, because at the end of the day, you did lie.

2. Working Hours – You may be working long hours, coming home at 10 pm, but just to impress them, do not lie about your work timings. This is going to be particularly hard to deal with post marriage because let’s face it, you work timings aren’t going to magically get shorter because you got married. You will only end up stressing yourself about home if you’re at work late, and about work, if you ever go home early.

3. Religious/Cultural Levels – If you have a low thresh hold of religious rituals or cultural rituals, make it clear. You don’t want to be forced for long hawans, or poojas, or rituals that make you uncomfortable after you get married. And it’s not just limited to rituals. It may even come down to ‘don’t cut your hair on Thursday’ or ‘don’t eat chicken on Tuesdays’. Your in-laws may not say this with the intention of imposing, but because you have given them the idea that you do believe in such things, they will want you to follow it. And this may lead to an ugly situation when you decide to have kids.

These lies may seem small at the moment.

MIL: Do you cook?

Non Cooking You: Umm.. yeah, sometimes. A few things here and there.

See how it may seem like not that big a lie? But the fact is, it may save you at the moment, but lead to far bigger consequences later on. So stay on the safe side, girls. Don’t lie to impress. You’re already awesome!

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Girls With Short Hair – Why Such A Problem

There has been an article going around on the social network recently, that speaks about how bad women look with short hair and how their hair are supposed to be long because that’s what actually make them look pretty. Do a little more research and you will dig up a lot more. Their are many men out there, who hate short hair on women with such a vengeance that you will wonder if they hold any personal grudge against it. But no, chances are they don’t. Then why such hatred? Because in their eyes, women don’t look as pretty. 

Now let’s understand something about us humans. We get used to things. It can be a home. A bed. A route to get from point A to point B. Anything. Similarly, we get used to looks too. When a guy who hasn’t shaved for a year suddenly shaves, he’s looked upon strangely. Not in a negative way or anything, just strangely. Because he looks much different and people around him aren’t used to seeing him in such a way. Now girls have been wearing long hair for years. Decades. Centuries. And all of a sudden, in the last few years, they aren’t afraid to cut it anymore. Because honestly, over a period of time, the gender on the whole, is becoming more confident. So yes, you’re probably not used to seeing girls / women with short hair. Give it some time. 

And if you still argue that long is how women should wear their hair, let’s take a step back to actually go all the way back. Men didn’t have magical hair that would cut themselves short. They too, used to keep their hair long. But over time, the concept of short hair came about among the men. For whatever reason, the women didn’t take to it at that point in time. But they are taking it up now. And this whole concept of being feminine is absolute bullshit. Both men and women had long hair initially. And over the years, we just got used to seeing women with long hair. Does not mean women need to have long hair to be feminine. 

And finally, long hair requires patience, money and maintenance. It’s not easy. Shampoos, conditioners, serums, etc. Not all women have perfect hair. They get wavy, oily, tangled, frizzy, limp and what not. All this requires girls to actually sit down everyday, and spend time and effort making their hair manageable. And still, just taming the hair does not mean it becomes manageable. Come a gush of a wind and they’re all over the place. They keep coming onto the face. In the eyes. You need to constantly tie them up to do work. And not to mention the heat in the summers. Managing long hair, is just not easy.

So bottom line, get over it guys. Because a lot of girls have.

Opinion: Is The Concept Of Kanyadaan Outdated?

This article contains the views of a single person. It is therefore written in first person.

I always knew about the ritual of kanyadaan in Hindu weddings and never really paid much attention to it. Until one day a train of thought led me to dig deeper and think and understand what is this really about?

If I were to understand it simply, it is the donation of your daughter. Kanya – Girl and Daan – Donation.

But to understand it better, here’s a line that explains it well: The father gives away his daughter as it is the best gift he can give to the groom, who at that time, is considered as a avatar of Lord Vishnu. Continue reading

Even God Only Helps Those Who Help Themselves

This article is for those countless number of women in abusive marriages. Those who suffer everyday at the hand of either their in-laws or their husbands. Those who want a way out, but don’t see one. Or are too scared. Or just don’t know how to deal with it. They take the abuses, the beatings but don’t have enough will power to get up and walk out.

They search high and low for help. Speak to various people. Read very many articles online, but in the end, don’t budge from their current positions.

People can tell you, advise you, support you, interfere to a certain extent, but at the end of the day, no one will do it for you. It is you who will have to speak up. And stand by for what’s right.

How will people help you if you, yourself do not take the first step. Because nothing can be done unless you don’t take that first step.

Because remember, even god only helps those who help themselves.

All the best!

Inside A Possessive Relationship

From the outside, he seems modern, progressive and overall, pretty chilled out. But few know the man he would turn into when he slips into the role of a boyfriend (and in many cases, husband).

In fact, many girls don’t even realize what happens when they get into the relationship. Suddenly, he stops liking your guy friends, doesn’t like you going out without him, doesn’t like you drinking without him, the dress is too short now, and so on and so forth.

So how, and why, is it that this educated, modern girl puts up with such a partner? Continue reading

Finding Your Space While Living With In Laws

Any girl, moving in with her in-laws post marriage would be confused at the thought of this. How will she and her husband manage to find their own space in a house with other people? I mean, wearing some fine clothes and putting on candles on the table for dinner while your in-laws sit there is just not going to be romantic. Heck! It’s just going to be plain weird. So how do you do this? Continue reading